Simmons College Class of 2006

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Simmons College Class of 2006

The Quote Wall

For four years Kristen and I kept a quote wall hanging in our dorm of random things people have said. Some of the quotes are completely random and outrageous. Some we remember, and some are funny just picturing how it came about.

The early years...

"Stop looking at me! God I hope someone shoots you!"- Sue

"If you hear the whistle.. courtesy flush!" Kristen (oh how we miss those communal bathrooms)

"So I have my feet over my head and all I can think is 'wow I really need a manicure"- anonymous

"So I can legally get a crotch in my face, but I can't lick alcohol off of it!?"-Jessica

"Hey! Cingular, my boyfriend works there! (long pause) Well, ok, this guy that I am in love with in my head works there. I'm always walking by like 'hello'..what?!?! STOP LOOKiNG AT ME!"- Jess

"We want a pitcher not a ball..licker"-Kris (repeated 4 times)

"Um, I think its ball itcher."-Jess

"Yeah that would make more sense."

"Well sometimes I get bitten by dogs, but that's nothing compared to the time I got bit by a squirrel!!"- random chick at The Fens

"Kristen, please turn on the light (click) ok phew. There was this shadow over there and I thought it was a mini UFO."-Jessica

"Jess you are so her bitch"-Sue

"Yeah, but I pay her with smiles.. wait that didn't sound right."-Kristen

"What the hell kind of name is Buzz Buzzby? That can't be real!"

"Just wipe it and drop it!!"- Jenna

"No. A bad lesbian is someone that blows shit up!"-Kristen

"I think I just got asked out... by a girl!"

"Kristen? Do you know what a box is? Not a box box, but a BOX"- Kristen's mother.

"Live long and vagina?"-Jessica

"Its your mom.. in a tissue costume!"-Kristen

"So I was masturbating with my vibrator when the song 'good vibrations' came on. That song has a whole new meaning now."-Jenna

"Its just that, I love the penis"- Sue, the virgin.

"I'm really thirsty"-Jess

"Do you ever think you could drink your own pee?" Kristen

"Yeah Kristen and I both graduated 7th in our class."-Jess

"Yeah 7.. that's God's number."-Kristen

"I just wonder if they enjoy wearing pants." Sue on the monkey animal cracker.

Carlos Mencia on TV saying: "my mother was basically a walking fetus with a head, by the time I was born I was just swinging from the cord." Jessica's response: "Oh that reminds me." and walks out of the room.

"I like old people because when they walk away you can catch them."- Sue

"Pajamas"

"Poh-tay-toes?"

"The worst thing that happened at camp, was one kid peed on someone else."-Julia

"Oh well, why did you give me that nipple sauce?"-Kristen

"Yeah.. that was during my squirrel phase."-Kristen

"I just can't stop thinking about chickens."-Jessica

Simmons Soireee...

"That's right. I am going to eat you and you will eat my ass."-Jess

"Hmmm..these cookies are good, not enough though. Need some chotch over here!" -VCT

"Wouldn't it be totally weird in the moon landed in the quad? I mean it would be cool if it landed and didn't crush us, yeah, cool."-Jess

"All I need to say is...KEVIN!"-Jenny

"Oh cock..cock..cockroaches"- Bowlegged slut

"Um..did you just say vagina?"-Jenna

"And the vagina was on a hinge, and then...there was this lazer beam that shot out of the clit. FIRE!"- Jess

"There is hidden crack in this room!!"

"So what was Captain Hook's name before he lost his hand?"

"There is ALWAYS time to talk about boobies."-Derek

"Yeah I would love to date you..once your mother dies."-Jess

"These boxes are tricky!"- Kristen

"Oh right. Cause she's a real friend.. not like those fake friends.. with the hair." Jess

"(loooong pause)...so I gave head to a banana once."- Jenna

"Don't you just love these red Victorias Secret Granny Panties.. that my MOM bought me?"-Kristen

"Wait a minute... you remember thta he was black, but you don't remember the giant pizza on his face?!?"

"Amanda! Amanda! Kristen, Amand isn't listening to me."-Jess

"Maybe because her name is Rachel."-Kristen

"As soon as she had a salami to stick in her bakery dish.. she's cured!"-Kristen

"She says she's in love again."-Jess

"Well she did just get back from kayaking."-Kristen

"I love all the hores!"-Kristen

"She lives in London....England!" Jenny

"I would kill.. literally kill for a piece of lasagna. If someone came up to me and said 'kill that dolphin' I would do it...well no, maybe if someone said 'shoot that seabass' I would do that."-Kristen

"If I were to go back to the first grade, I would be a god."-Jessica

"Hampsters are people too!"-Jessica

"Don't write on my socks, my mom will get mad!" Derek

Here is to the memories we'll never forget.